You Belong in the Zoo (September 19, 2006)

I took Kellee and Faith to the San Deigo Zoo yesterday. It was Faith's first time there, and she had a blast. It was fun to watch her face as she looked at all these new creatures that she had seen and read about in her little books (or J.A. Deane's Blogs) and realize that they were real. Any how, here are couple pics:


Monkeying around!


Checking out the Giraffes.


Watchin the hungry Polar Bear feast on some bones, and happy it's not ours.


As the old saying goes "Leave sleeping Pandas Lie"


WOW!!! Settle Down There.


Digging for Gold and All I keep getting is Bronze.


Our favorite Animal was the Hippo.


My sexy jungle women.

Havasu Hell (July 21 2006)

Have you ever had one of those icky-sickly feelings in your gut that tells you not to do something, because it probably will end really badly? That happened to me last week as I was planning my familys vacation to Lake Havasu. I kept telling myself this is not going to go well, back out while you still can, but I went against my conscience thinking that it was just a small fear of going camping for the first time without my in-laws. I should have listened to the small voice in my head.

The day before we left for our trip, I called my wife and asked her if she picked up our propeller from the shop where we took it to get it fixed or replaced.

"No, I didnt know I needed to go over there, you never told me that," was her reply.

So I frantically called the shop from my work to see if we could still go over and get it, but to know avail; they were closed. So now we are planning to go to Havasu with only one dinged-up, bent propthats not good. The sickly feeling is even greater at this moment as I knew this was a sign not to go.

Things were already in motion at this point, everything was packed, all my daughter kept talking about was the BOAT, my niece was ready to ride the tube, and I had already paid for the camp site. We were going to Havasu.

So there we were Sunday morning preparing to leave, the only problem was that we were not prepared. So we didnt end up leaving until 1:00pm. On our way out we had to stop and get gas. We chose to go to Chevron in lieu of my favorite pump place, ARCO. When I opened the door to get out and start pumping, my dog, Boo, darted out of the door and disappeared in a nearby field. My wife wanted to look for him, but we were on a schedule. Make no mistake, I was actually thrilled and elated that he had scrammed. Ive been wanting this to happen for awhile. I have wanted to be rid of Boo but my wife always talks me out of it. Now Im not the bad guy, the dog darted on his own.

As I was pumping the gas, my wife and niece went in to get drinks for the trip. They came out with a 44oz iced coffee that would make you gag by just the smell. Where was my Pepsi? They were out, in fact they were out of everything, Pepsi, Coke, Dr. Pepper, and their Sprite tasted just like water. Now Im not a person that believes there are signs all around you and you just need to find them, but if ever there was a sign not to partake on this trip this would have been it! I knew right then that I should turn around and go home.

On the way out of the gas station, Kellee was holding back tears because I was not going to go looking for our mutt, and my niece kept asking, cant we just go look over in the field. I tried to explain that we were on a tight schedule and that Boo has made his decision, but neither seemed to buy this answer. Then I remembered that I forgot to fill up the gas cans, and check the air in my tires, so we headed back to Chevron. As we pulled up, there came Boo running at full speed towards my truck. Kellee and Savonna were jumping up and down, hugging and kissing this miserable mutt for being a good dog and coming back. The only good thing about this trip was short lived.

So we headed out for Havasu; we made it to Hesperia. As we were coming out of the pass, my boat was swerving back and forth, so I pulled over to see what was going on. All the tread on one of my tires had come off. It was completely bald, ready to blow at any moment. So I had to drive very slowly on the freeway about 5 miles into Hesperia. Ever try finding a local tire place thats open on a Sunday? We found oneFirestone. They had a tire that would work, but it wasnt a trailer tire. So off we went in search of a trailer tire. Everyone else was closedwell, except for mega-chain Wal-Mart. So we headed to Wal-Mart! They had the exact same tire as Firestone, only I would have to take the tire off myself and of course it would be a 4 hour wait. That little voice in my head was now screaming at me GO HOME!!! Do not go forward, it can only get worse!. I refused to listen to my conscience, so we returned to Firestone and had the tire fixed. Once again we were off to Lake Havasu.

About 100 miles from our destination, we stopped at a rest area so we could stretch and relieve ourselves. Thats when we began to notice the clouds. They were dark and terrorizing, thunder was rolling, and lighting was beginning to spark on the darkened horizon..

Storm approaching: it looks like a tornado

We got back out on the road and in no time at all we were caught in a flash flood monsoon storm. There was literally lighting touching down within 10 yards of my truck from the North, West, and East. I could barely see in front of me, just enough to notice in time that everyone in front of me was throwing on their brakes. A big rig had jack-knifed in front of us and clipped another car, blocking the two lane highway. So there we sat in the midst of heavy rain and lighting, blocked from getting out of this storm. A couple of years a go I would have thought this was the greatest thing in the world. But now my daughter is in the car, and I am beginning to worry. Traffic slowly begins to move, everyone is going around the diesel truck, and soon it becomes my turn. The only way around is to go off road in the muddy desert sand. I know if I dont move everyone behind me is going to become enraged, because the want to get out of the storm as well, but if I go off-roading, then chances are high that I am going to get stuck in the mud and life is going to be even more miserable. We went for it and made it through, but it was still a scary ordeal.

We out ran the storm, but it pursued us and was closing in. Our only hope was to get to the campsite soon and set up quickly before the storm was on top of us. We arrived at our site at 10:00pm. We stepped out to a sweltering 107 degrees of cool night time weather. We were in a rush to get the tent up so we made haste and pulled out the tent we borrowed form Kellees parents and in a mad rush tried to put it up. There were only a few small problems; we had never put this thing together before and were now trying to do it under the use of Chevy headlights. Also, we didnt have tent stakes! How can you put up a tent without tent stakes, especially, when there is a storm coming and its heavy winds are going to beat against your tent?

So there we were, drenched in sweat, and furiously frustrated trying to put this tent together, while at the same time trying to keep an eye on our daughter who kept wandering off into the darkness or stumbling over the tent poles. Finally, a grandmother who was in the campsite across from us, could not bear seeing my sweaty-tear stained daughter running around crying any longer. So she brought us over 4 tent stakes and with some rocks we were able to put the tent together. It was only 2 ½ hours later; thankfully the storm never made its way to our camp that night. However, the humidity that the surrounding storms brought was almost unbearable. Within an hour our tent became a sauna, and our air mattress was a waterbed from our sweat. I literally drank two Gatorade bottles in my sleep, which wasnt much because my daughter kept waking up and screaming through out the night. My only hope was that tomorrow offered a new day.

Monday came and with it so did Dave Mustaine (of Megadeath).

Dave Mustiane of Megadeath; not really the person in the story, but looks alot like him.

As I was waking up and getting ready to spend my day on the river, up drives this Hessian on a tiny-tikes motor bike that looks like he just left the Dio concert last night. So he rides up to me and says, how long are you guys going to be here?.

Thinking that he was making polite conversation and that I might have my first river-rat buddy, I reply gleefully, Until Wednesday.

At that he instantly becomes enraged and shakes his head in disgust. He then angrily asks, Is your dog going to be barking every morning?

I was taken a little bit back by this, Especially when I realize that me and Megadeath arent going to be rockin out together any time soon. So I answered his stupid question with, probably, hes a dog.

He then revs his little-mans bike up and shouts, well that f@$#ing sucks!. And off goes my hopes of once again becoming a metal-muncher.

Soon after the incident with Megadeath, Kellee points out that our campsite has a lot of bees. I dont mean a handful, more like a hive full, all swarming around our dingy cramped little bit of dirt. Not, too much later, I notice that our site also has a peculiar smell; much like a fish corpse rotting in the Havasu heat that had already reached 100 degrees by early morning.

Twenty minutes after the encounter with my Hessian neighbor, the Indian maintence man came by to see how everything was going. He asked if we had paid yet, and I told him no but that we did have a reservation. So he directed me to the office and then told me that he had already received complaints about my dog. Irked but still smiling I told the Indian manager that I would keep an eye on him and make sure that he was not yapping. All this and its barely 8:00AM.

So, Kellee and I went to the office to pay the bill and talk with the manager about the situation and see if we could switch our campsite for the betterment of all involved. I walk into the office and guess who is there? Thats right, metal-muching-methed-out-Megadeath- Mr. Mustaine! He is in there complaining about me again!!! And at the moment I walk in the lady at the front office tells him, its one thing to have a barking dog, but the fact that he was rude to you is a whole different ordeal. She then asks if she can assist me, so I tell her that I am here to pay the bill and see if I can move campsites. She then asks, well what campsite are you at?

"701" I respond.

Mind you Mr. Mustaine looks like a kid who just got caught telling a lie and the Indian manager just has a shocked, quizzical look of his face like oh s&#Àhe just caught us talking about him. So there I am furious and still wearing a smile, but somehow laughing at this situation over a beagle that I want to throw into the middle of Lake Havasu. Anyhow, Metalhead is now content and I can get on with my vacation. However, Kellee told me that When the metal mulisha walked out and went to get on his tiny-tots bike that was parked right next to my truck, Boo stuck his head out the window about 4 in. from his face and started howling his head off. Thus, infuriating Megadeath even moreI guess Boo is not completely worthless after all.

So now we are moving our whole campsite at 10:00 am. I should have been out in the water 2 hours ago, but instead I am having to relocate my camp. It was worth it though, no noisy neighbors, a bigger camp, close to the bathrooms (a must when you have a newly potty trained little girl), and no Bees or fishy smell.

We head out to the boat and cruise around for awhile. Savonna rode the tube by her self and had a blast, though she was angered that I drove a little to fast. Then I took Faith on the tube and rode around a little. After that the tube ripped, thus ending our moments of fun and excitement.



Crusing in our boat

In the evening, our good friends The Kriedels came out to visit us. That was a great time and made the frustration of the morning and previous day slip away. Its funny how with some people you can go years with out seeing them and then just pick up where you left off when you are reunited. It was great to see their three kids and get a chance to hear all that God is doing in their lives.

We decided to take the boat to the sandbar and let the kids run around and swim in the water. Someone however, forgot to mention that the lake was low. On our way up to the sandbar we bottomed out a couple of times. Kolby and I had to get out of the boat and push it up river. We pushed until the river ran deep again, however that dinged up, bent prop that I was cruising around on really took a hit when I hit bottom. We couldnt get the boat past 20rpms. Not wanting to risk damaging my boat any further we decided to turn around and push the boat back to open waters and cruise back to camp.

Pushing our boat into deeper waters

The Kriedels left at 11:00pm and as they left the storm moved in. With the thunder and showers came the humidity, and therefore another night of sleeping in the sauna. It was so bad that Kellee got up in the middle of the night, went to the showers and soaked herself, pajamas and all, came back to bed and laid down next to me without drying off. She also soaked a towel and had Faith sleep on it. Surprisingly Faith and Kellee slept great, while I was waking up drinking Gatorade and wiping off the sweat that was covering my body.

Faith sweating but cool from a wet towel.

When we got up in the morning, we decided we were done. We packed up and left a day early. It is nice to be home.